Monday, 19 November 2018

Confession : Sacrification

Recently, Strava is the application I explore more compare to another application mobile. My other media social is full of hatred. Even though 95% my goal achieve this year, I lost the most valuable thing. Friendship. Because of "jealousy" and rumor. I prefer to step down all. I push others away from my life.

At this point, I'm not sure who is right. But I took blame to myself. It is all because of me. Why? because in the end, it hurting myself more compare to others. watching the disappointment in their face is one of the things I hate most.

I realize when I let go all, watching them far. Happiness among them is growing ( like watching a beautiful rainbow after the rain). I believe this is the best thing I do for them. This sacrification I do, I don't need recognition. I believe if we sincerely with the friendship, we should happy with their happiness. Furthermore, it proves my theory that: I'm bad luck charm to them.

Ok. So after that

My strava on October
To battle with my negativity, I'm preparing myself alone for my Beast Spartan. To gain positivity, at first is hard. My strength came from prayer and dua. My favorite surah is Al-ikhlas. Every time I feel sad, I will spend more time with my mother, keeping myself busy and focusing more on run. (But most of the time, I focus more on workout and my office work).. so toxic (LOL)
This three months, I focus my run by targeting at certain total mileage. Strava is the place I keep my data there. I see improvement a lot at running pace. Run is like mathematics. if you want to be really good in your running. You need to practice them. You can't trust your inner natural athlete to do most of the job for you.

Enjoying my solo run at Bukit Kiara ( not fully explore the hill yet, there are lots of route in Bukit kiara trail)

People call this trail (Bukit Kiara) as Roller coster trail, actually this trail for bike

Run is my "love" but honestly, sometimes I fight with myself. There was some demon inside me, prevent me to run. (But I need to fight it because Run will make my day). Next year, I want to participate in Ultra... long distance run ( no drama ). (LOL)

this writing is part of my diary. Till next confession...tatata!

Thursday, 15 November 2018

The power of checkilist

(contoh, checklist sebenarnya terlalu sukar untuk dibaca)
This year everything went smooth ( grace to Allah). I believe if we plan, ( even though we're not sure for the outcome) , we able to focusing the present. I never have done this before. Always writing on the blog what is my goal. And never to read it back even don't follow up what was my target of year.

But this year was different. In December '17, I write down in A4 Paper ( it's just a sketch, only I can understand my own writing). Then, I stuck it to my wall. Every day I wake up, I will read my checklist. Sometimes, I feel like a stupid person because look silly to read that checklist. Especially, the writing is ugly but it was written sincerely from my heart.

Things that I really want.

I realize today, almost 95% from checklist I successfully completed. And I proud with my achievement ( yer la siapa lagi nak proud kalau bukan diri sendiri). One of the things that I feel blessed when I got a new job. One of the listed company in Bursa Saham. I need to be active in sport (got some credit and extra recognition here). InsayaAllah ,it will give me more motivated to work there. And of course, it is one of the best company I been worked because of their benefit to staffs is awesome! ( awesome for me)

So my conclusion here, never underestimate your dream and write down in the paper. And read it every morning after you wake up.

Dan kena sedikit berusahalah . Bukan baca sahaja *wink*

Tuesday, 17 July 2018

My First Spartanrace

My first Spartan race (Introduction)

I remember, this race I enter on December 2017. I’m been told that I’m not qualified yet in others words “not fit enough” by my friends when I decided to join the race. I wait for almost a year to prepare myself for this race. Besides waiting and training my weakness. What I did was registered another OCR races such as Viper Challenge, Mad Warrior and Amazon race and hoping the right time comes to me.
Completed my Master and Viper Challenge 2017 Series (photoshot)

Finally, after completed my Viper Challenge series medal and graduated with my Master. I reward myself by brought Sprint Spartan ticket and it’s open category and located in Sire park , Iskandar Johor. When I remember my journey in OCR. Critics from friends, Families and unknown people were one of the reason I got the strength to build my sport skills ( never have it ).

My first Sprint at Sireh Park December 2017

You weakness is your strength. But truly, the critics was hurt my feeling a lot in several time. Sometimes, I down and can’t accept the comment. The comment broke my heart and always underestimate my effort and the same time I feel they did not appreciate my struggle. Now, the time has been passed. I’m prepare myself for the third race. Super Spartan that will be this end of July

Throwback Sprint Open Category Sireh Park 2017

I believe if we focus one by one our weakness in obstacle, it able to help us to conquer the next obstacle course. After 9 OCR events ( my estimation), the number obstacle I conquer increasing. How ?Every time in OCR race, if I failed to complete the obstacle fully. I will mark that obstacle in my next training plan. ( That’s beauty of OCR course, you have  already planned what you want to do during race for upcoming race).  For example, I failed to do rope climbing, In next training, I will practice a lot of my grip and enhance the skill technique climb. Some can be conquered immediately after practice. Some are not. It took time and depends on skills especially if you’re beginner in sport ( no experience at all like me )

Location between Hotel Ariana Iskandar and Sireh Park

Located in Sireh Park, we have chosen Hotel Ariana for our stay. Cheaper and one of the nearest hotel at event. Plus, the distance was near to Spartan event. However, for facilities and accommodation ? not so. One of the examples, the place was not near to ATM machine. Therefore, you need to travel to nearest town which was Bukit Indah . Food? Limited choice. Have one Thai food there and mamak no sure halal ( because suddenly we got feeling “was-was” about the halal status for the mamak stall)

You can survey Hotel Ariana from if you planned to stay in here. But, my suggestion…please booked early because this hotel is among the Spartan favorite during the  race.

Review of the course during Sprint  2017?  I mean Sireh Park itself . It is a public park with approximately 343-acre land and urban jungle. Suitable for jogging, trekking, mountain bike and boating. The elevation hill similar like Taman TTDI park but more on the natural path only in front of the park, the  path was homemade ( for Sprint ,not sure the elevation experience for Super, Beast and Ultra).

One of the slope in Sireh Park


One of the tough challenge during event, after carrying sandbag you need to run up to the hill and there you go! rope climb after hill. The second tough obstacle was bucket bridge….go to a high elevation to carried the bucket and carried to high slope.

Bucket carry

With one of the superstar Malaysia Spartanrace- Saddam

With one of the superstar Malaysia Spartanrace- Raj Ahmed

That’s the mental challenge I experience it. During google, I found review about Sireh Park here is the link. Just in case you want to find some clue and how’s it. Or you might use Instagram by search using hastag #sirehpark.

Monday, 9 July 2018

when a 120kg crazy bitch addicted to OCR?







Is quite long time I’m not writing in here. There were a lot thing I want to share it. But, I didn’t know where to start. Let start again. I’m practically busy to prepare myself for my upcoming Spartan race. To remember back what happened  3-4 years ago, I’m fat. Totally F.AT with all sadness and bad luck surrounded in my stories. I’m stop blogging because I been betrayed and been cheated (love stories burrghhh….. , I already forgive to all of them - no need elaborate in details ). But I never forgive to a person who’s talking bad behind me and pretend to be my friend during my suffering ( which was I found it this stories last week).


Been cheated by your bf,

Unfinished thesis

Been scolded by your Professor

Hectic work



Oh yes.. almost been diagnosed for blood pressure





To many things to list in here


I’m a desperate lady who’re seeking new life and happiness . Can you feel my pain ? You try everything like try winning back your bf’s heart. Work harder. Try to search good material for blog. Everything. Till one day I decided to enter Viper Challenge in March 2016. It change all my life.





My first Obstacle run




I’m fat…very fat , people bullied you with words. Gemuk, banyak air, obesity. Besar macam gajah. (Fat, horny fat girl, big like elephant) . Even your own families critics your body appearance. Itu belum part kena gelak dengan kawan sekolah, university, ex-boyfriend yang dulu-dulu.  So, the time I joined Viper Challenge was about to “let go my frustration AND ANGER” not to become thinner ( because I lost my hope to lose the kilos) . I’m crazy bitch in pain furthermore  nobody wants to listen to my problem. Yes…no one care. People that I trust avoiding me. Like they didn’t want to listen to my stories. I feel mental down and crying all time in bathroom.  So, I want to torture myself by participate this “crazy sport” But things become different, when I been taught  and guided to do workout. First to prevent injuries. Second, I gemuk kot. Siapa nak angkat aku?. All the training help me to divert my problem to become “one energy”. Positive energy. (It’s hard to change your negative aura to positive aura even till now)



My workout regime killed my sadness. I control portion food to drop a few kilo to make sure that I able to pull myself . Tak payahlah menyusahkan orang lain. Aku kan gemuk. Besar macam gajah. By the time, I finished my first ever obstacle run. I can’t believe it. Even 20 obstacles. I only can make it 6-7 obstacles. (oklah………tak pernah pun try kan). It motivates me a lot and I becoming ocr junkie since then.